It’s about the time and effort that you put into something. Not the probability of whether or not something will happen for you.
You see people live their life based on probability, which is luck. They based their life on wishful thinking, hope, wonderment. We live in a time where people don’t want to work for want they want anymore. They believe that everything should already be finished by time they receive what it is that they want. All I have to say to that is. If you’re waiting on a already finished product. Keep waiting. Because just the thought of you not believing that you have to put work in for anything that you want is insane and a insult to those of us that do bust our ass for any and everything that we desire and some.
For example, I have a friend and he in my opinion is a hopeless romantic. He always is going out and talking to these girls and making connections. He gets these girl and date them and falls in love with them real quick. I say about a three to six month window I will receive a call or be hanging out with him and he will tell me how toxic they are. Everytime he gets with one of these young ladies their back story is that they are nursing students or have a law degree and work for a law firm. They are going to school to become a doctor. They sound like they have their stuff together. They are in organizations clubs, sororities, honors programs, internships, etc. But later own they crack and fold under pressure. Out the clear blue they don’t know what they want to do. Insecurities out the ass. They are judging him making him feel bad for their shirt comings and what all they have been through. Hahaa. I think it’s funny sometimes. He calls me or we hang out and he’s asking me what should he do. Because they are stopping him from focusing on his business that he has on the side. He feels like he can’t focus 100% of his time, energy and effort on what he’s trying to accomplish.
Now fellas and ladies when you hear a man blame a women for his short comings. What is your reaction?
Cuz I know what my reaction is.
Now we have these talks and he tells me that he does not like when a women blames a guy for what she’s going through and flips the conversation around on a man like if his fault and be expecting a apology. I laugh more in my head because hey a women don’t like being wrong. When their right they are right. When their wrong their still right. According to them. He doesn’t like the whole thing that some of the women that he mess with is dealing with issues that he gets to stick his neck out for them but he keeps getting his neck trampled on. I just tell him that you’re not going to find the perfect girl. All of them have their issues and insecurities. It’s just some of them are a little more stable minded than others. But they still crazy as hell. As a man we love y’all, with your crazy ass. But we love you still. It’s take two to tango.
When I tell him this information he says that he doesn’t have time for all of that. He ain’t got time to spend on his partner. Helping her get to a place in her life that he believes that she should already be at. Now I like that he says this because he is not wrong for feeling this way. Hey, if he don’t want to spend time building with a person that is alright. There is nothing wrong with him feeling this way. But my dude stop trying to make connections with these girls then. Because what do you expect out if the relationship with another human. Hahaa, he must expect a women to already come built.
See and this is what I mean by luck. People expecting the job to already be complete before showing up to work mentality. He’s not going to find a put together women unless him his self is put together. You can’t expect someone to not be drama filled and toxic when you yourself probably are housing the same garbage within. I wonder is he realizing that he’s constantly attracting women that are just like him.
I don’t know the term for this if someone know the term for what I am about to describe please let a brotha know. People are backwards. We love going into other people domain that’s more dirty then ours and start complaining because the filth is uncomfortable and unbearable. But when it comes to our garbage we are either hiding it or calling a blessing from above. We got to stop that. If we want change then you change first and then surround yourself around change that will appreciate over time not depreciation in value.
Personally I don’t think that he should be in a relationship because I can detect that he just want these girls to come already prepared so he don’t have to deal with them but they deal with him. But he’ll learn. He doesn’t want to listen as of now but soon he will. I hope that is not to late. But I’m using his story as a back drop to say that you can’t expect life to be handed to you in a silver platter. You have to work. Even though the heavenly father brought his Hebrew Israelites into the land of the Canaanites. Still the Israelites had to still work. They had to show their allegiance with he most high. They may not built everything in the land but they still had to go through a weeding process to even get there and show that they deserve it. You can’t go through life doing less and expecting more. It doesn’t work that way. Faith without works is dead. You gotta go for whatever it is that you desire. You can’t allow yourself to slip into a lazy mind set.
And another thing you can’t keep blaming people for your short comings. If you are a man there should be no excuse as of why you are allowing a women to run your life. I don’t care what these feminist say. It’s bull at the end of the day. The reason why the women is running your life and dictating certain successes that are manifesting into failures before your very eyes is because you have your priorities backwards. A women. Is beautiful and a joy to have when she is in her right mind that is. But she should never be number one on your list. Most of these relationships are a distraction. I see alot of you boys thinking that the key to success is getting a women that will ride or die with them and then they will accumulate their success. Good luck with that buddy. If you find you a mature P.Y.T then God bless you. But lets be real a man should be focus on the most high number 1. Because he orders a man’s steps. Not a women. Because when shit hits the fan. We will be asking God why. Not our women. They will be looking toward us to have a game plan to get out of this rut that we are in.
But anyway stop sitting back waiting for God to open up the sky and pour out something that you didn’t grind and work hard for. Because it ain’t happenin captain. The amount of effort and work that you put into something is what you will get back from it.